i juz got home from aep and i still feel like crying!!shit i'm so damn sad!god u dunno how sad i am.THREE times noe?!?!1 i can tahan.2....okay....maybe i can take it but 3?!?wahahah. NICOLE MOOSA'S OUT OUF FUCKING AEP!!!darn it.ah ok i noe i shd be happy for hher.yes i love nicky and i always want the best for my dearies cause i want them to be happy ppl so wadeva's gd for them,i'll be happy with.but i'm sorry i'm in the mood to feel selfish now and think abt myself and be sorriez for myself.but can u blame me?IF ur 3 bestest friends who are the one thing that kept u going abandoned u.and left u alone to deal with something as shit as aep?!? first rosie, then claire,now nicky!!!i swear if van or kelsey or bern walk out on me i will be past feeling upset and i will seriously whack u guys upside down kk?!?wahahah. wanna cry i juz lost nicky!!well, i'll still see her in school everyday so u might think it's realli stupid but i swear it's different!haiz but losing nicky,in a warped way, has made me a lil' bit more grateful..
i haven't realli thought abt it much but when mr tan gave nicky the letter of release i felt like she had abandoned me after 10 yrs!and it hit me like whoa!10 yrs is a LONG time for a friedship to last.like how many friendships can last that long.and i realised how lucky i was cause i literally had nicole next to me practically my whole life.laughed with her,cried with her,fought with her,suffered with her,go psycho with her....god she was there.always.and for god to have let us be in the same class, taking exactly the same courses for 10yrs.it's like such a blessing!and i was gettin so upset during aep todae.and then i realised,i lose ONE of my best friends, in aep and i'm so upset.how the hell am i gonna leave ij behind,and all my darlings with it a tthe end of the year?!god that makes me even more upset.i love my darlings.i love ij,the sch, the uniforrm.i love the ppl there.i love the teachers.(omg!did i juz say that?!? :))but yes!i love EVERYTHIN about ij!!the last 10yrs of me life has been great!!i mean sure i have problems.but who doesn't?but i've been blessed with so much!i think once i'm forced outta the sch at the end of the year,i dun think i'll ever stop missing it!!!ah dis is so depressin... guess all i ca ndo now is treasure the lil' bit of time that i have left and make the most of it....
ok.now that i'm done.big big apologies to my other darlings at aep.i'm so sorry for being such a sulky jerk todae!i juz couldn't bring myself to get into my usual laughy mood cause i was so upset!sighs.kana stabbed 3 times!sighs.haha.yea think i owe kelsey one!i pinky promised her that i'd go for aep todae but i dun think i was REALLI there....haha.sorriez dear!
and oh yea.nicky if ur reading dis,congrats on gettin out of aep.as pissed as i am at the moment.i love u!always will.
